When I begin to think about this title I don't just think of it as a task, but I have found it motivation to really question my psyche. What do I need to inquire about? What am I unsure of? How can this further me? At this point I realised we are constantly inquiring, life itself is a query, a huge question mark in itself. So what was came next was to apply this natural technique to my practice and here are the results:
What is my practice?
The largest question of them all, something still anonymous to me. Earlier in my blog I posted Thoughts, Feelings and Reflection.... Without even realising I had already started reflecting, re-reading this really helped my with this inquiry. My career and passion began as a ballet dancer. The training, the discipline all so attractive to me, but as we all know we grow up and reality really sets in. I am now a graduate of a professional musical theatre college, with the aim of working in what we call 'the profession'. After careful consideration I am truly beginning to believe that my practice (for this moment in time at the least) is as a performer. I am not yet ready to hang up my dancing shoes, though I am still curious and enticed by what the dramatic world has to offer. I begun, unknowingly, on this new and exciting journey of really, becoming established. The journey whereby I find my feet and secure myself as a professional, not just a graduate. My training has set me in such good sted for the ever changing world we operate in. Upon reflection I am thankful that I have been taught to be able to 'turn my hand' to each option I am faced with. Despite that, this inquiry will never be answered nor set in stone, it's something we will constantly ponder, almost an insecurity, a form of acceptance that I am enjoying discovering.
How is this course confirming my practice/furthering my career?
I have always favored myself as a fairly academic student, so the writing and learning side I am finding all very thrilling. The part that is stumping me the most is this 'reflective' nature. To really think, understand and reflect on yourself as a performer, a professional and a person is a skill in itself. The theories and studies behind all that we are learning are so beneficial to the technique that this skill can be acquired. It provides an element of confidence and a boost in the right direction. I am also finding the laid back nature in which we can overlook and research how others attending the same course as us are portraying their findings of great interest. The fact that you can really see the improvement from one blog to another gives confidence and satisfaction in the fact that yours is moving in the same direction. So yet again this is an ongoing inquiry, but I really am enjoying that fact that nothing seems to be a closed case.
When do we know we are ready to move on?
I did not just relate this to the tasks within each module, but to the tasks we face in our everyday life. I find myself fairly dependent on the 'say so' of others that you can become 'stuck in a rut', confined by what is going on around you. This is one question I really am beginning to understand and answer; I'm finding it purely based on confidence, with the ability to to defeat fear. Many of us are so afraid to 'fail' as it were, we look to others to almost share the blame of mistakes made. We must be secure in ourselves to move at our own pace, in our own time, in our own space. Sharing knowledge is a fantastic tool, but the real skill comes within us as we process, reconfigure and reproduce it to benefit ourselves. I'm not yet ready to put all this into practice, but truly reflecting on this concept I have found to be a great start.
As you can imagine, with our never ending and ever expanding inquiring minds, every day holds a different question with a different answer. As I follow this course further I am sure I will become more confident and more willing to share these with you. For now it would be great to hear your inquiries, and answers to mine.
I have found these questions interesting. I seem to be asking the same thing. When did we ever think we'd be calling our work practice? I have been a jobbing performer from 10 years and it was about the job, the creativty and the money. The idea of it be my practice is kind of beautiful, do you think?
ReplyDeleteKnowing when to move on is hard, especially as the whole course is set up on unfinished always reflected on tasks... I try to revisit my learning every now and then, but it's a tricky one. I find a summary helps me conceptualise my learning so that is kind of keeps it all contained for when i do revisit it. Do you get what I mean by that?
Ahmet, I like the idea of professional practice being a beautiful concept. The idea that your work isn’t based on one job at a time, but on your, skill, knowledge and how and why it’s your profession, and that it is directly linked to you as a person, and can change and grow with you.
ReplyDeleteI think this is linked to your question Simone, What is my practice? I don’t think it is necessary to define yourself, it is fluid, you began wanting to be a ballet dancer, moved to musical theatre and have interest and curiosities in many other areas, and this is all part of your practice.
I too began and trained in ballet, moved into musical theatre, and I now teach children and work with adults with learning disabilities, I don’t think any one defines my practice, they are part of who I am as a whole and have informed decisions and helped me gain skills in a variety of areas. I use my practice, to define the way I do my work not vice versa, I feel the skills we are learning are transferable. Does that make sense?
Like the two of you I have struggled with knowing when to move on, but I have come to the conclusion that when I have gained something valuable and it has impacted on my professional practice that it is then time to look for something else and move forward, like you said Ahmet the course is “set up on an unfinished” but I think that then allows us to move backwards and forwards, we may come up against a challenge later that pushes to go back to work or ideas we have already done maybe? Perhaps that is why the course is set up like this, in a few months we may look back and see something different in the work we have done so far?
Danni.
Ahmet I completely understand what you are saying and I do agree. I think the reason I have been reluctant to summerise the sections as of it is due, partly to the fact, that I do not feel ready to 'let go' as it were of each section. I have left them open ended with the intention to return to them, but maybe I do need to gain the confidence to draw a line when needed.
ReplyDeleteDanni I love the way you have interpreted my first question, I completely agree, this industry i something I guess we do not want to be completely labelled in. I think it might be an insecurity that if we are not achieving in a given area we are not succeeding, but then as you said why constrict ourselves?
Simone, these questions run through my mind too. I too am struggling with reflecting upon myself, I think we are taught to reflect as performers but do we actually do it? For us, It's all about competition, who can sing, dance, or act better than who? Who can be the best? We're always striving to be better, so to take the time to sit back and think about ourselves, it's a little scary, but why? As we can only better ourselves surely? Only time how we go...? :)
ReplyDeleteOur practice as a performer, as Ahmet said, is a beautiful one, I mean look at what we do for a living compared to the general public, we love what we do for a living! Not many people get to say they love their job. So the idea of being tied down is a little strange for us, as our profession is constantly changing. Be it, contract to contract, or theatre to film, to TV, or even modelling. Being behind the camera, or directing, changing to fashion design or taking photography on the side. All these things and more interest us as performers, so like Danni said..I don't think we need to define ourselves, we can just be ready and open to expand as and when the opportunities get presented to us.